Perspective helps…until it doesn’t.

 

I can’t tell you how many times over the last 9 months I have told myself that I should not be having a hard time, because my lot in life was not nearly as difficult as _____’s (fill in the blank) life. 

Sometimes this comparison worked.  There were moments when it truly helped me to remember that other people were out of work longer, that other people also had to leave the place they loved, that other people had trials that made unemployment and moving seem inconsequential.

 

But there were moments when this comparison didn’t help at all—moments where instead of feeling encouraged I just felt more frustrated.

I finally realized something--

Perspective helps…until it doesn’t.

 

Sometimes it helps to look around to gain perspective on our trials.  Sometimes seeing the suffering others are experiencing helps us to appreciate how much more difficult our own lives could be.

But sometimes (and I have yet to see a rhyme or reason in the timing) it doesn’t work that way at all.  I finally decided that there are times when we need to allow ourselves to feel sorrow and anguish about the experience we are going through.  Moments that we should grieve about what we have lost, whether or not that loss seems as significant as another’s.   I have come to believe that while perspective is helpful, we also must acknowledge and honor the feelings in our hearts…and only then can our hearts can begin to heal.