tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-89883738505749302662024-02-19T02:37:54.022-08:00thoughts from my crayzdaze...Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12013437808532340270noreply@blogger.comBlogger1805125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-7589409559753291152023-01-26T13:37:00.001-08:002023-01-26T13:38:39.485-08:00Scripture Study dilemma <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</div><div>For more than a decade, when I have been studying the scriptures it's been a very very slow study. So slow that I've been doing this off and on for 11 years and I'm almost done with 2nd Nephi. I did take the concussion years off, the Isaiah chapters dragged on and on, and from time to time have been reading other scripture. But still, it's just so slow. </div><div><br></div><div>So I had resolved that this was it. That I was done with the slow method and I was going to go back to a regular reading with journaling when moved by the spirit. But because I am a little orderly, I decided that I'd make the switch after 2nd Nephi. (Which is one of my favorite places in the Book of Mormon, and if any part of the Book of Mormon deserved a minute examination it would be this part.) </div><div><br></div><div>I wasn't going to write exactly what I'm doing because it just seems like such a ridiculous way to study the scriptures, but I think I need to include it. Many many years ago I noticed that my mom had a spiral notebook by her scriptures, and when I looked at it, it was clear that she was rewriting the verses from the New Testament in her own words. Young me did not understand what she was doing at all. Older me, when Russ lost his job in North Carolina at the end of 2011, had the idea that it might be good to make sure that I understood each verse well enough to be able to restate it in my own words. Typically what I do is read through the chapter, then write in my scripture journal, verse by verse, what the scriptures mean in my own modern words. This is not always as easy as it sounds. Often I find myself using a child's version of the Book of Mormon that we loved for our children to see what words that author has used. After I am done with my "analyzing" I also write down the insights that have come to me throughout the chapter, which I keep written on a sheet of scrap paper until I'm ready to write them down in my scripture journal.</div><div><br></div><div>Yesterday I was working with a couple of verses in 2 Ne 31. The spirit brought me some really good insights as I was working with those verses. As I wrote them down on my scrap paper I was excited to be able to include them in my scripture journal.</div><div><br></div><div>And then the question occurred to me, would the insights still come as much if I wasn't moving so slowly? If I wasn't really immersed in each verse one at a time?</div><div><br></div><div>I don't know the answer. But it could be that I have read the entirety of the Book of Mormon through enough times in my life that going this slowly for the next many decades might not be a terrible thing. š¤</div>Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-1050060298036868572023-01-11T20:35:00.037-08:002023-01-14T15:02:22.508-08:00Family Letter 2022<span style="font-family: arial;">Happy New Year! 2022 was an amazing year for our family, filled with many beautiful adventures and a few difficult ones as well. Iām excited to be able to tell you about it in this format, with lots of pictures. (If you're reading this on your phone and wish the pictures showed up bigger--you can click on the picture and then enlarge it.)<br /><br />Sadly we were all together only once in 2022, at the beach in North Carolina. But our week together was terrific, and thankfully we've had other time together in smaller groups throughout the year.</span><span id="docs-internal-guid-54b6ee29-7fff-1aad-635f-2bd0b8ae939e"><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></p></span><span><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"></p></span><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgorovLpZ4rptbx5hETTvXHx9cHcpR_yxHeUMT7K76TH3mEv1oREmBnZtuVWPj9bmmRa9RRU0EPVQaHDBSTUxZYcKdN7nihWLeZWDoN0h1ZJLT4GYMDl7eUngKs7_dblp15caK9X_TpIxmaZTWrz6uXInR8ps-N9LQ2uifBA13qVFutDsCws81cag/s1600/FAVORITES.01.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgorovLpZ4rptbx5hETTvXHx9cHcpR_yxHeUMT7K76TH3mEv1oREmBnZtuVWPj9bmmRa9RRU0EPVQaHDBSTUxZYcKdN7nihWLeZWDoN0h1ZJLT4GYMDl7eUngKs7_dblp15caK9X_TpIxmaZTWrz6uXInR8ps-N9LQ2uifBA13qVFutDsCws81cag/s320/FAVORITES.01.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><b><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: x-small;">Back: Kate, Cindy Lynn, Mahon, Josh, Jason, Danny, Ruth, Rachel<br />Front: Jenna, Cindy, Russ, Ashley, Jared</span></b></i></td></tr></tbody></table><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span><div><span style="font-family: arial;">Russ had quite the year. In his job at Intel heās been the manager of a small group with just 2 other people that supports a much larger group. As a manager heās had to take all sorts of different trainings, figure out how best to use the resources available to give his co-workers raises and bonuses, and finally in this last part of the year to worry about who was still going to have a job going in to the next year. After months of worry we found out just this afternoon that he is still employed, but the experience has been so unsettling that we are still going forward with our photo organizing business. </span><span><p></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwQn-xOjptO9V1eBQbKQyYh-X8wmPwRpApa4DWeZUbye_qCA9pohA2G-e22ReTa3XzStdTGaLydzD_sneF3N0iJxnt3NSNdRCtEbGiN0OvTaGoby0SWZjUnJeKcqwDD87O6whKhK_ybc1CCNX1tt5_1wMrl1M4PGld5v8sUkEr9sb_fAciBrtjFw/s1600/Ray%20Family-161.jpg" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1067" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwQn-xOjptO9V1eBQbKQyYh-X8wmPwRpApa4DWeZUbye_qCA9pohA2G-e22ReTa3XzStdTGaLydzD_sneF3N0iJxnt3NSNdRCtEbGiN0OvTaGoby0SWZjUnJeKcqwDD87O6whKhK_ybc1CCNX1tt5_1wMrl1M4PGld5v8sUkEr9sb_fAciBrtjFw/s320/Ray%20Family-161.jpg" width="213" /></a></span></div></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;">Russās favorite parts of the year (I donāt even have to ask him this!) were spent looking at the ocean. After our week at the beach with our kids and our friendsā kids we spent another week in a small condo with just our friends. As our families have gotten older/bigger/grandchildren weāve realized that we donāt have a lot of time to hang out with our friends at the beach like we used to, so this second week has been wonderful. He also enjoyed spending time with me in the beautiful ocean of Hawaii in October. By then we already knew that there was a possibility of layoffs, but the trip was already paid for so we figured we might as well have a last hurrah if thatās what it turned out to be. We spent hours every day in the ocean looking at the fish and true to his turtle whisperer nickname, he found one turtle on our very last snorkel. Besides cooking great Sunday dinners for us every week, Russās other favorite hobby has been watching families on YouTube who live on sailboats and sail around the world. </span></p><p><span style="font-family: arial;">My 2022 was a year that felt very ābest of times/worst of times.ā I spent the whole year having online book clubs with different groups of women that were just wonderful and fed my soul. In the early spring my NC book club reunion was back in Durham, and it was terrific. I spent some time in Utah with our families, and in September took a wonderful trip to CT to spend a week with Jason, Ruth, and (especially, of course) Danny! I had looked forward to that visit for months, but did not expect that it would be my second trip there of the year. </span></p><div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfuSrmjQy1xui5qup4OFyDs3kFvTpbm0_SVn_fb15lNu2vpfbk_uSBp5BfnsVf3ya35nNUKn3Lulf5DaC-6KF5-1HEVjzUXXEj65oQJgf0SH7w1xRWcey7mzCNX9HxrMdRJgNsBDM1lAZPa3V9wMnifPajXoHoX9r21PqCe6Uscc3jkAk5ZsALmA/s4032/20220924_182858.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfuSrmjQy1xui5qup4OFyDs3kFvTpbm0_SVn_fb15lNu2vpfbk_uSBp5BfnsVf3ya35nNUKn3Lulf5DaC-6KF5-1HEVjzUXXEj65oQJgf0SH7w1xRWcey7mzCNX9HxrMdRJgNsBDM1lAZPa3V9wMnifPajXoHoX9r21PqCe6Uscc3jkAk5ZsALmA/s320/20220924_182858.jpg" width="240" /></span></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><b style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">(Healthy) time with Danny in Sept.<br /></span><br /></span></b></td></tr></tbody></table><span style="font-family: arial;">In June Iād convinced Cindy Lynn to go on a once in a lifetime trip to swim with dolphins in the Bahamas. Not a choreographed dolphin swim, but going out on the ocean every afternoon with a guide who was very knowledgeable about dolphin behavior and getting in the water when we found calm, interested dolphins. It was a beautiful trip, but also much more exertion than either of us had expected. I wasnāt feeling great by the time we left Bimini, and then the air conditioner in the Miami airport was broken and I felt even worse. Our plane left Miami late and we missed our connection for Portland at JFK. Before we were able to get our bags and make it to our hotel near JFK, I had started throwing up. The first year we lived in Oregon I had a bad experience with a supplement that caused gastritis, and I found out that I have something called cyclical vomiting syndrome. Which just means that once I've started throwing up, I can't stop. I havenāt thought of it much in the intervening years, but that night I desperately wished I was traveling with medication. In the middle of the night I went to the ER there in Queens, and letās just say that the ER in Queens is a whole different ball game than the ER here in little Hillsboro! Back at the hotel, Cindy Lynn had fortunately packed an extra day of all of the different medications she needs to deal with her cystic fibrosis, but she knew she still had to fly home that day. She called Jason in Connecticut and told him that he needed to come to the hotel so that he could pick me up from the hospital when I was discharged. Then I laid in the dark hotel room for 2 days until I felt strong enough to ride a shuttle 2 hrs to New Haven, where I pretty much laid in their bed (or occasionally on the floor) for the next week. I didnāt eat for a week, lost 13 lbs, and it took me a full month to feel recovered after I got home. It was the kind of misery I wouldnāt wish on anyone and I was unbelievably grateful to have kids who took such good care of me. <br /><br /></span><p style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: left;"></p><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjX0618E8YboyE4oiCDlYfx9H2DgiqHpr5St137HSpBwzZ2SfMhThERBLkNR0kbGj3uXCh_V9w7s-D7gObDwK3RETnkRSyb6NcS-ANt-bZgjdhsZ8zTBNTzcpMeA0oeRbqPm_cWAlF43KYLrHgaqQc1G63hrj01fbemE1mijFAMrsfNumknipatCg/s5568/Bimini.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3712" data-original-width="5568" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjX0618E8YboyE4oiCDlYfx9H2DgiqHpr5St137HSpBwzZ2SfMhThERBLkNR0kbGj3uXCh_V9w7s-D7gObDwK3RETnkRSyb6NcS-ANt-bZgjdhsZ8zTBNTzcpMeA0oeRbqPm_cWAlF43KYLrHgaqQc1G63hrj01fbemE1mijFAMrsfNumknipatCg/s320/Bimini.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><b><i><span style="font-size: x-small;">Cindy Lynn & I surrounded by sting rays!</span></i></b></td></tr></tbody></table><span><p style="text-align: left;"></p></span><p class="MsoNormal"></p><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: arial;">Cindy Lynn spent the year working on her next book, No Matter the Distance, which comes out February 21st and will be the first-ever traditionally published novel about cystic fibrosis thatās by an author with CF. She has gotten really interested in trees and plants and particularly making medicinal salves from them. When covid rates were low in 2022 they traveled to Connecticut to visit Jason's family, and in the fall to Utah and Idaho. Cindy Lynn is my favorite kid because she came to swim with dolphins with me in the Bahamas. She still homeschools 9-year-old Kate, who loves reading, art, and knows more about cats than most adults.</span></div><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoqp_Oj6TPJNrUbGC5LnA6-JIjjnRnBjpH0yx8E-4LO-TQ6wZf_5WxRwaYX8YQpRtJSqMaOp2Wz-kfLD-Hz7-zzLQkak5ze3cBv4uAO5coYEuPvrkONADouIswPn_tvyUJU87IO96Z0YPOfWDxvIGoPmhW1aFmAXzqjJzqS7fI-FYUS2pPfwmQHA/s1600/Ray%20Family-71.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoqp_Oj6TPJNrUbGC5LnA6-JIjjnRnBjpH0yx8E-4LO-TQ6wZf_5WxRwaYX8YQpRtJSqMaOp2Wz-kfLD-Hz7-zzLQkak5ze3cBv4uAO5coYEuPvrkONADouIswPn_tvyUJU87IO96Z0YPOfWDxvIGoPmhW1aFmAXzqjJzqS7fI-FYUS2pPfwmQHA/s320/Ray%20Family-71.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Cindy Lynn, Kate, and Mahon</span></b></i></td></tr></tbody></table><p></p><p style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"></p><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: arial;">Cindy Lynnās husband, Mahon, graduated this summer with a Masterās in Artificial Intelligence from Georgia Tech. Mahon spent 11 months of the year designing software for a company that helps organize clinical trials, but was unexpectedly laid off at the beginning of December. Heās seeing this as a blessing in disguise since now he has more time to work on his robotic pantry while he's looking for a new job. I have had to stop doubting Mahonāevery time he says heās going to make something amazing or fantastic I secretly doubt him and then he always does it! So Iām looking forward to the unveiling of the robotic pantry one day and am ready to offer up mine as a beta installation.</span></div><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgunDM6WoUs7H5kNSGWrdvRk73HULMfkNiWvmqgPQ3TfkMy4h5-DNPXmsugTfqrcHXtQE-cfwpgsOjWJxkW4iRIZ3pjwLu-pg06y7gJnxhUWn5oi0hLKHNGeAnDccL2N2MnP3vhzwpaBhEQ_drzQcN94oPoCk_6o8gqjw1Xrkn9_u0nGmZfe-elLA/s1024/318170977_2976097126020024_4916950016597193633_n.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1024" data-original-width="768" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgunDM6WoUs7H5kNSGWrdvRk73HULMfkNiWvmqgPQ3TfkMy4h5-DNPXmsugTfqrcHXtQE-cfwpgsOjWJxkW4iRIZ3pjwLu-pg06y7gJnxhUWn5oi0hLKHNGeAnDccL2N2MnP3vhzwpaBhEQ_drzQcN94oPoCk_6o8gqjw1Xrkn9_u0nGmZfe-elLA/s320/318170977_2976097126020024_4916950016597193633_n.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><b><i><span style="font-size: x-small;">Touring Yale--Jason with Danny in the stroller,<br />Mahon behind Cindy Lynn in her wheelchair holding Kate</span></i></b></td></tr></tbody></table><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: arial;">Jason, Ruth, and Danny (19 months) are having a mostly grand old time in Connecticut! Jason is finishing up his final year of his Chemistry PhD and is VERY ready to get out of the "hell hole" that is grad school and find a job in biotech where they "treat people like people." We are excited for him to have that too! In his non-school time he loves video games, board games, his new calling as choir director, and painting mini figurines that go with one of his games.<br /><br /></span><p style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: left;"></p><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMaQUCXoSgRRFxTU8ufDVH0OVLmeJAGMSDZlfbGLgAcL3n19WcDjrW6wzXe4sgoGi_DAZIpOYVOzTjDITb1mL7haRNz7G0xZ6cm2r3Q-C38irgE8A49JYt26PdJpQX8qPbabdvUA8UlGcsc8VZKgcMEi5mgQZceIvh3i_3sWf-Bjaq5Gf9mDTbbA/s1600/Ray%20Family-14.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1067" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMaQUCXoSgRRFxTU8ufDVH0OVLmeJAGMSDZlfbGLgAcL3n19WcDjrW6wzXe4sgoGi_DAZIpOYVOzTjDITb1mL7haRNz7G0xZ6cm2r3Q-C38irgE8A49JYt26PdJpQX8qPbabdvUA8UlGcsc8VZKgcMEi5mgQZceIvh3i_3sWf-Bjaq5Gf9mDTbbA/s320/Ray%20Family-14.jpg" width="213" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Ruth, Danny, and Jason</span></b></i></td></tr></tbody></table><p></p><span><p style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></p></span><span style="font-family: arial;">Ruth on the other hand absolutely loves her job leading the marketing team at Cogstate. She has recently taken up embroidery as a hobby, loves reading, a good Zumba workout, and all things Disney+. Danny is ALL toddler and an adorable "agent of chaos"! He aggressively loves books, singing, and dumping all items out of any container in his path. Jason is my favorite child, as he came and rescued me in NYC, and let me hang out with cute Danny while I was recovering. And by hang out I mean lay on the couch and watch him play mostly, since at that point reading him one book was enough to wipe me out for a whole day!<br /><br /></span><p style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: left;"></p><p style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: left;"></p><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0x8tTSGRgHZfuAEDQShnCCEaOfeuKTMPsUYgA2-M4Vp2L2jj9-PDa1tMqu4_EKoKjiFx5xyFkHhWINmb-IofklTfUxCal5Y3KJrtDjnQn73PtGqlYpPt0lZeb34eQL55SZeACvr3Pt1k9FhhG1CgNwXqCDSidofC0n2yCl0Ba7GcVMHhzQHs2IQ/s1600/Ray%20Family-57.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0x8tTSGRgHZfuAEDQShnCCEaOfeuKTMPsUYgA2-M4Vp2L2jj9-PDa1tMqu4_EKoKjiFx5xyFkHhWINmb-IofklTfUxCal5Y3KJrtDjnQn73PtGqlYpPt0lZeb34eQL55SZeACvr3Pt1k9FhhG1CgNwXqCDSidofC0n2yCl0Ba7GcVMHhzQHs2IQ/s320/Ray%20Family-57.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Josh, Jared, and Jason</span></b></i></td></tr></tbody></table><span><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></span><p></p><span style="font-family: arial;">Josh is working at Intel and sharing a house with a friend about 20 minutes away from us. We love that he comes over for Sunday dinner every week and several times during the week to spend time with Tiger. He still loves snowboarding as much as he can at Mount Hood, and surfing at the coast. Mt Hood has one of the longest snowboarding seasons, and Josh was able to snowboard and surf in the same month last summer! Josh is my favorite child because he comes to hang out with Tiger and clean the litter box several times a week.<br /><br /></span><p style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: left;"></p><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGjV-H7hdMOgTzYfKqt8JzPNhoMDMVEnJ1ODEcASvCMMiStFVnHaCPWGXg57hdnwdtca5Z6FCQG1cjLY1ONKaq3p_tE56GOfjNMDwAE-di-jPZsDdrhisU28cckCHbCYJsihkIT04ACyBjhgO5oKrrD7IgkyNN70lWqYuRrGNUs0AgbdVwK_PBEw/s1126/image000000_20230112_211530-01.jpeg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1126" data-original-width="921" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGjV-H7hdMOgTzYfKqt8JzPNhoMDMVEnJ1ODEcASvCMMiStFVnHaCPWGXg57hdnwdtca5Z6FCQG1cjLY1ONKaq3p_tE56GOfjNMDwAE-di-jPZsDdrhisU28cckCHbCYJsihkIT04ACyBjhgO5oKrrD7IgkyNN70lWqYuRrGNUs0AgbdVwK_PBEw/s320/image000000_20230112_211530-01.jpeg" width="262" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Josh & Rachel after a day of surfing at the coast</span></b></i></td></tr></tbody></table><p></p><span><p style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: left;"><br /></p></span><div><span style="font-family: arial;">Rachel is working on her final year of classes at BYUI. She'll walk at graduation in April and then student teach in the fall. In the summer she taught swimming lessons in the neighborhood every morning and worked at Jersey Mike's in the afternoons. She enjoyed surfing with Josh over the summer and she and Jenna got together with one of their high school friends regularly to twirl their rifles. She has better roommates this year which we're enormously grateful for. Rachel is my favorite child because she's always happy to watch a chick flick or Christmas movie with me.<br /><br /></span><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUZMbZrOPymBC_iAmTcpYXUcPedVkAUwGMqdpR6_oyIPW2sUYKO_4CmKiaYuJ8MJoBkq39c_jRG49Q-aK2T63FtfyDouvuKSM3jnc4Q15Ua_hkjWPyZB5PVakAP9PquggpNXnrUXWv8AlzkUUr8f5svFzBh6esU9hFyW3NL2YSco6kGg0SmxYVcg/s1600/Ray%20Family-113.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1067" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUZMbZrOPymBC_iAmTcpYXUcPedVkAUwGMqdpR6_oyIPW2sUYKO_4CmKiaYuJ8MJoBkq39c_jRG49Q-aK2T63FtfyDouvuKSM3jnc4Q15Ua_hkjWPyZB5PVakAP9PquggpNXnrUXWv8AlzkUUr8f5svFzBh6esU9hFyW3NL2YSco6kGg0SmxYVcg/s320/Ray%20Family-113.jpg" width="213" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Rachel</span></b></i></td></tr></tbody></table><span><div><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family: arial;">Jenna switched her major to software engineering in 2022. She was such a good summer employee at Jersey Mikes that the whole place basically fell apart when she and Rachel left! Jenna has had great roommates she connected with through Instagram this school year, and theyāve become some of her favorite people. She enjoys playing guitar, volunteering at the cat shelter, and taking pole dancing classes (but not, she adds, āin a stripper wayā). She got to see her favorite band, Greta Van Fleet, in concert, and painted a cool jacket to wear there. Jenna is my favorite child because she's always happy to go hiking with me, and hiking is definitely one of my love languages.</span></div><div><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div></span><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyoaXU08ntgAD_nGOMYr7WE5Ye3cpZTA4wu0RuR9yQ3T_ZxqQjiC0GLN5OZel-pNpNGQlB3WaAXFyAlTyNcOM4I_bH9b5RgFbslIZ6tBSG28fuwfohm2CdlbjG_vsvFu3eHtQUOMifthKKtMfIZI9ZiPp58zAtXGsO8RM9n1Giz86gF6h29_jvBQ/s1600/Ray%20Family-126.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1067" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyoaXU08ntgAD_nGOMYr7WE5Ye3cpZTA4wu0RuR9yQ3T_ZxqQjiC0GLN5OZel-pNpNGQlB3WaAXFyAlTyNcOM4I_bH9b5RgFbslIZ6tBSG28fuwfohm2CdlbjG_vsvFu3eHtQUOMifthKKtMfIZI9ZiPp58zAtXGsO8RM9n1Giz86gF6h29_jvBQ/s320/Ray%20Family-126.jpg" width="213" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Jenna</span></b></i></td></tr></tbody></table><p></p><p><span style="font-family: arial;">Jared loves snowboarding and has been able to teach snowboarding at Sundance for the last two winters. Last winter, he went snowboarding more than one hundred days! He also spent a lot of time rock climbing, as well as hiking and camping with his wife Ashley, this summer. They built a bed into the back of their Ford Escape for a great camping setup. Jared worked at a physical therapy clinic for a lot of this year. Heās still at BYU, but hoping to graduate in a little over a year with a degree in exercise science. Jared is my favorite child because he sends me beautiful pictures from the snowy mountains.<br /></span></p><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwSQz8RLWlUIWi-AdhHQbot1StamlbkMtck0a9ef7TWnDvsImrJ7albHNVlhStnplsVG8lXKTrOJieKszKSVIUZyKCghzEVHHnpz5a6YMsjgqLenNEHdOhtGAoH3w6DKOHYV7FZ3Cm7Lf9HjtpmkeGXm3m1ZRmwoaSOEw5QmA0KdtcmO72UHkGlQ/s4032/IMG_8407.HEIC" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwSQz8RLWlUIWi-AdhHQbot1StamlbkMtck0a9ef7TWnDvsImrJ7albHNVlhStnplsVG8lXKTrOJieKszKSVIUZyKCghzEVHHnpz5a6YMsjgqLenNEHdOhtGAoH3w6DKOHYV7FZ3Cm7Lf9HjtpmkeGXm3m1ZRmwoaSOEw5QmA0KdtcmO72UHkGlQ/s320/IMG_8407.HEIC" width="240" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Ashley & Jared</span></b></i></td></tr></tbody></table><p></p><span style="font-family: arial;">Speaking of Ashley we're so happy to be able to report that her leg has healed and she is back to normal. Being hit by the car in the first half year of their marriage added a lot of stress to that first year, and they have loved being able to do fun things together this last year. Ashley is going to school at UVU studying recreation management and also working in the office at Sundance. She loves houseplants, makes cool original embroidery, and is always practicing her snowboarding. </span><br /></div></div><div><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhO_IeOitaEe5k0SI_un31fKt8M21_hNQvbpWJxg32CzsVMZba2lsmaIkligacXLaDqcBdzdQFa6ba-7zYI8f66vleofMHGlA0Hm1Hx8bM58LFbSFZXB_DLd5L-EjHtlq2JU6Lq_QkiYu6UXiyb9y_JVeSp6RXBDLMfLvKG4fqCz5PHqmEVdumVUw/s1600/Ray%20Family-98.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhO_IeOitaEe5k0SI_un31fKt8M21_hNQvbpWJxg32CzsVMZba2lsmaIkligacXLaDqcBdzdQFa6ba-7zYI8f66vleofMHGlA0Hm1Hx8bM58LFbSFZXB_DLd5L-EjHtlq2JU6Lq_QkiYu6UXiyb9y_JVeSp6RXBDLMfLvKG4fqCz5PHqmEVdumVUw/s320/Ray%20Family-98.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><span style="font-family: arial;"><br />We hope you've enjoyed the picture-heavy version of the annual Ray family newsletter! We love keeping in touch with each of you and love when we get to hear what you've been up to. Thanks for being a part of our lives,<br /><br />Russ, Cindy, & co.</span><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5KOgje6yhsEKpy-NE1WCTk1c6oFkkGu8bHXTqiQNl-m1XpBpqkAqgqp0O-jlnDTLjWdsVGwor7EjIU3V8nKPObsAovYbeebxKB40pkLaTfdJDdlngUP79v5i3Qf5yMsX4pVXC4BMEbu9EvvPBdOF1MuuFdJDXxMxgd3wllG-aqRaVrzI2PVfZ0A/s1600/Ray%20Family-60.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5KOgje6yhsEKpy-NE1WCTk1c6oFkkGu8bHXTqiQNl-m1XpBpqkAqgqp0O-jlnDTLjWdsVGwor7EjIU3V8nKPObsAovYbeebxKB40pkLaTfdJDdlngUP79v5i3Qf5yMsX4pVXC4BMEbu9EvvPBdOF1MuuFdJDXxMxgd3wllG-aqRaVrzI2PVfZ0A/s320/Ray%20Family-60.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Jared, Cindy Lynn, Josh, Rachel, Jason, & Jenna</span></b></i></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><br /><span style="font-family: arial;">Contact info:<br />Russ russray@gmail.com<br />Cindy crayz2sew@gmail.com<br />Cindy Lynn storygirlcindy@gmail.com<br />Mahon (and his robotic pantry ideas) mbbaldwin@gmail.com<br />Russ & Cindy's photo organizing business: <br />RCphotosolutions@gmail.com or RCphotosolutions.com</span></div>Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-85009633961418767752021-01-10T20:17:00.001-08:002021-01-10T20:17:07.749-08:00taco cat goat cheese pizza<div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</div>I would like to tell you about ordering this game Rachel who wanted it for Christmasthis year:</div><div>1) not available on Amazon (what is EVER not available on Amazon??)</div><div>2) not available at my local Target</div><div>3) available at a Target an hour away, so I order it, I'm going to be in that city in 5 days</div><div>4) Target says it's ready and must be picked up in 3 days š¬</div><div>5) I call, cancel my order, set a reminder to order again in two days</div><div>6) In 2 days, game no longer available at any Target in the state of Oregon</div><div>7) I googled to see what other stores sell this game: Barnes & Noble</div><div>8) Of course not my Barnes & Noble</div><div>9) I give up, order from B&N online, pay almost as much for shipping as for the game.</div><div>š¤·</div><div>She was excited. š</div>Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-30582979005678040112021-01-05T12:45:00.001-08:002021-01-05T12:45:35.654-08:00Christmas thoughts<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</div><div>I just typed out a big response to a Facebook post, and then thought that I would keep it because it contains an evolution that is important to me.</div><div><br></div><div>Our family used to be in the unequal category--I took care of all of the Christmas things, and Russ didn't do anything except help with some decorations. While we didn't have huge Christmases, I grew up poor and it was very important to me that we had "enough" Christmas. I'm not a huge gifts person, but my Russ isn't at all. Then I did two things that really helped our family, and a third later. </div><div><br></div><div>First, I told Russ that he was on his own with his parents. If it's not important enough to him to do something, that's his deal. Second, I pointed out that we were creating selfish Christmas kids because they weren't giving any gifts, just getting them. (We both come from large families so there wasn't gift giving between families by the time our kids were old enough to really take part.) He started taking them to the dollar store to choose gifts, and for several years we received truly terrible gifts. š (Because the kids were young and picked terrible gifts, not because it's not possible to find a decent gift at the dollar tree.) When our kids were older they decided to do a random gift exchange and we have done that using elfster for many years now.</div><div><br></div><div>When our youngest kids were about 15, I decided I couldn't do Christmas the same anymore. For us, once our kids were that age the things they really wanted were things that were outside of our Christmas budget. It bothered me for a couple of years, and on this particular year it just all came to a head. I felt like I was almost randomly buying things just to hit some imaginary gift quota, and it was really not in keeping with some other values that I have. I told our kids after Christmas that year that I was changing things from that year forward, and that instead of spending money on things that were fairly meaningless, we would spend money on things like experiences instead. I've made sure that everybody has something to unwrap on Christmas morning, and this year (2021) because experiences are a little iffy still š¤£ everybody had two. We had to work on being very intentional with our Christmas morning so that everything wasn't over too fast. It's had the lovely side effect of making the kids gift to each other even more important. Anyway, all of that has helped me not feel like I'm a stressed out one woman Christmas show! </div><div><br></div>Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-66885901134335644352020-05-05T01:28:00.000-07:002020-05-05T01:28:28.089-07:00Answered PrayerSo, pandemic. I keep thinking I should write about this here so that it's part of this record too, even though I haven't blogged in so long. (What can I say, Instagram really is faster. š¢)<div><br></div><div>When President Nelson called for a worldwide fast in April on Good Friday, someone formed a Facebook group so that people could invite their friends (of different faiths or no faith) to join with us. Reading the comments there has really been a highlight of this hard time. It's also been challenging, though, as so many people post their difficulties and prayer requests. </div><div><br></div><div>When I read a post asking for prayers I usually say a prayer right then. But tonight after I prayed for safety for our family, I thought about all of the people in that group in distress or need, and all of the people in the world struggling right now. </div><div><br></div><div>This is highly unusual for me, and not something that was anywhere near my mind. But as I got ready to close my prayer I truly heard these words in my head. </div><div><br></div><div>"<i>...will ye not now return unto me, and repent of your sins, and be converted, that I may heal you?</i>" 3 Ne 13</div><div><br></div><div><br></div><div>Always a favorite scripture, right now it's our only hope. </div><div>ā„ļø</div><div><br></div>Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-85931053108812535792018-11-29T21:05:00.001-08:002018-11-29T21:05:45.806-08:00The Zen SnorkelerMany years ago we laughed at a line from a movie that said that Mormons could be Buddhist too. Over the years I've come to see that there is a lot of wisdom in Buddhism that I could benefit from.<br />
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The first day Jenna and I went snorkeling we got in the water, went to the right, and almost immediately saw a turtle! What were the odds?!? (I mean they weren't terrible because of where we were, but it was still a surprise.) After we snorkeled for a while we got out, had a snack, and warmed back up. Then when we got in again and went to the left, we saw even more turtles! So awesome.<br />
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The next morning we got up and went to a different snorkel spot. (Dumps, henceforth to be referred to as Konahena to pay tribute to it's beauty!) I knew that we would see a lot more fish there since it was part of the marine preserve, but I also knew that if we were set on seeing turtles, all of the fish in the world wouldn't be satisfying. So I told Jenna before we started that we needed to be a little Zen about our snorkeling, and appreciate whatever we saw each time rather than deciding that we weren't going to enjoy it unless we saw something specific. (Meaning turtles, of course.) She agreed with me that it would be smart to think about it like that. </div>
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Happily, we saw turtles most of the times we were snorkeling. But we were also able to enjoy the other things because we had decided that we were going to be happy with whatever happened.<br />
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Whatever we saw was going to be amazing, which I think is a pretty good way to live.<br />
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<br />Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-77961793019107742002018-11-27T21:13:00.000-08:002018-11-27T21:13:28.365-08:00What are you dragging behind you?Jenna and I just got back from her senior trip in Maui. Turns out when I'm snorkeling I have a lot of time to think deep thoughts!<div>
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Jenna and I did something that Russ and I had enjoyed doing last time we were in Maui. We walked to Ahihi Cove from the Konahena (Dumps) parking lot wearing our water shoes and carrying fins. Then at Ahihi Cove we put the water shoes in the mesh bag, put on our fins, and we snorkeled back to Konahena from Ahihi. I put the drawstring of the mesh bag over my head & shoulder and snorkeled with it and could almost not tell I had it with me. </div>
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About 15 years ago we went to the Big Island with two other couples. One day we rented kayaks and kayaked across Kealakekua Bay to snorkel at the Captain Cook monument. (The Big Island doesn't have as many "from the shore" snorkel spots as Maui does.) One of the couples pulled a boogie board behind them to use while snorkeling. We were all kayaking along, and then we realized that two of us were FAR ahead of the third couple. At first we couldn't figure out why the third couple was having a harder time, and then we realized that it was the boogie board slowing them down. Sure enough, once they held the boogie board they started moving faster.</div>
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As I snorkeled out of Ahihi Cove with Jenna that day I marveled at how easy it was to tow the bag with the shoes along with me. I don't think I would have predicted that. It was completely worth doing, since having the shoes with us meant that we could have a different and unique snorkel experience. But I also thought about how I wouldn't have guessed that a boogie board (which floats on it's own) would exert such drag on a kayak that day at Keakalekua Bay. </div>
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The thought came to me that in life it's important to pay attention to what things are weighing us down and/or holding us back. Sometimes things that we think are unimportant or even positive might actually be negative. And things that might at first glance seem like they'd have a negative effect might help us and nor be negative at all. Definitelly something to think about...</div>
Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-40850346536073070442018-07-11T14:24:00.001-07:002018-11-21T18:50:55.132-08:00My Climber<div dir="ltr">
She climbs on the rocks on the other side of the beach, slightly more than a small dot of color when viewed with my glasses and invisible without. Every now and then, I raise the completely zoomed in camera to try to take a picture, and always, within a moment or two, she raises her arms in a victory sign. <br />
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She is my child who chafes at attention and notice, who wants a little more space and to be a little more grown up. But it is clear as she is climbing, that almost as much as I am watching her, she is looking across the beach at me.<br />
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When she reaches the top of the final outcropping she pauses again with arms outstretched, waiting for me to signal that I've gotten the picture. To some degree she is humoring me--I know this. But I hope that there more to it than that. I hope that she also feels this connection, that despite the distance between us, we savor her experience, together.<br />
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Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-83706979443936977912018-02-26T21:08:00.003-08:002018-02-26T21:08:22.795-08:00A day in three acts[Normally I love Mondays. Josh takes the kids to school and the van to work, and I get to sleep in (good in these times of nighttime pain), have a slower morning, then I walk to the max at the post office and take the max to meet him. He picks me up and we drive to his apartment in Hillsdale and then I come home with the van, usually just in time to deal with dinner. Today, however...today was a day.]<br />
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On Thursday or Friday an email went out from the Relief Society saying that there had been a death in the ward and asking for food contributions for the funeral on Monday. I told the RS president that I was happy to make a cake, but that she'd have to pick it up because I wouldn't have a car and would be on my way to the max station to meet Josh.<br />
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On Sunday evening I went to the pantry to get a cake mix out to put on the counter so that I wouldn't forget that I'd promised to make this cake. Much to my surprise when I got to the pantry all of the cake mixes were gone, having been used to make cupcakes over the past few months. <br />
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"No problem," I thought, "I've made plenty of cakes from scratch and I can certainly do it again..."<br />
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Act I <i>Before Noon</i><br />
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Monday morning I woke at the lovely hour of 10am. I'd had quite a bit of pain in the night, so I was relieved that I had been able to sleep later. I took my time waking up, had a glass of electrolyte water and my handful of vitamins, and then came into the kitchen to start making my cake. I googled to find a good recipe, softened my butter, and then started to preheat the oven. Right as I was pushing the last button I had a sinking realization...Russ had used every last bit of flour Saturday night to make pancakes for the girls for dinner. Every. Last. Bit.<br />
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On a regular day I would have just run to the store to buy a cake mix. But, of course, it was Monday, my day with no car. <br />
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I grabbed the computer and wrote a desperate email to my ward's women's email list. <br />
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><i>Sisters I am totally having a crisis. </i></span><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;">
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<div style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;">
<i>I promised to make a cake by 2 for the funeral today thinking that I had a mix in my pantry.</i></div>
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<i>Well---not only do I NOT have a mix in the pantry, Russ used the last of the flour making pancakes! (what a good dad to make pancakes for his kids!)</i></div>
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<i>And wait--it gets better! I don't have a car today because Josh has it at his job, AND I have to leave here by <span class="aBn" data-term="goog_1013765892" style="border-bottom: 1px dashed rgb(204, 204, 204); position: relative; top: -2px; z-index: 0;" tabindex="0"><span class="aQJ" style="position: relative; top: 2px; z-index: -1;">12:45</span></span> (<span class="aBn" data-term="goog_1013765893" style="border-bottom: 1px dashed rgb(204, 204, 204); position: relative; top: -2px; z-index: 0;" tabindex="0"><span class="aQJ" style="position: relative; top: 2px; z-index: -1;">1 hour and 40 minutes from now</span></span>) to take the max to meet him because the triplets all have dentist's appointments today! </i></div>
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<i>Can anyone help me out??? If you have a solution for my problem, text me. I'll be anxiously waiting to hear from you. Any of you. Anxious...</i></div>
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<i>Cindy</i></div>
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<img alt="š" class="CToWUd" data-goomoji="1f643" goomoji="1f643" src="https://mail.google.com/mail/e/1f643" style="margin: 0px 0.2ex; max-height: 24px; vertical-align: middle;" /></div>
</blockquote>
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I trusted that the good women in my ward would come through for me and within 2 minutes my phone rang with an offer to take care of the whole thing for me, then came another phone call offering either cake mix or flour, and lastly and email offering cake mix or flour *and* a ride to the max! I happily thanked everyone and went out to sit in the hot tub for a little while. <br />
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Act II <i>Noon-4:30pm</i><br />
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I didn't leave myself quite enough time for my normal cottage cheese & frozen blueberry breakfast, so I put it in a tupperware in my backpack (that held Rachel's book for after the dentist), grabbed another water bottle of electrolyte water, picked a podcast, and took off for the post office. I made such good time I was there 6 minutes early and didn't even have to jog at all! <br />
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While I was on my way my friend Susan texted me with some questions she wanted to be able to discuss with someone in her ward. I thought about those and looked for some links while I was on the max, and told her that I'd call her after I'd dropped Josh off, while I was on my way to pick up Jared and then the girls for their dentist's appointments.<br />
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Josh and I had a fun visit on the way to his apartment (and I finally finished my breakfast), and when I dropped him off I immediately called Susan. She's always such fun to talk to and was excited to hear that I'd been to a Terryl and Fiona Givens fireside on Saturday. We hadn't even finished covering her questions when I picked up Jared and drove him to the dentist. (It will be interesting to see what he took from the part of the conversation he heard!)<br />
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I dropped him off, kept chatting, drove back to Glencoe, picked up the girls, drove them back to the dentist and dropped them off, still talking. Then I sat in the Costco parking lot (where I went to buy some flour!) and chatted for 15 more minutes before saying goodbye so I could go in and do my shopping in the few minutes before I needed to be back at the dentist's office. <br />
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I had been so involved talking to Susan that I never had thought to drink my 2nd bottle of electrolytes, but there in the last few minutes I was really thirsty. Then when I was in Costco I went to the bathroom and I was a little alarmed at how obviously dehydrated I was. Not sure how that happened, I'm normally (not that this day was anything normal!) really good at hydrating!<br />
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Act III <i>After 4:30</i><br />
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As I started loading my Costco purchases into the van I got a text from Lorraine, reminding me that last night we'd planned to walk at 5 today so we could talk about the fireside. I told her that the dentist was running late and that I wasn't sure what time I'd be back. She agreed to meet me at 5:30, but then while the kids and I were on the way home she texted that she was exhausted (she was very involved with the family having the funeral today) and that she was going to head back to Vancouver and would call me on the way home so we could just talk on the phone. (My feet weren't sad not to walk again today.)<br />
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When I got home I put some rice in the rice cooker and then we unloaded all of the groceries. When Lorraine called I grabbed my headset again and more electrolytes and sat down (exhausted!!) in my room to talk with her. We had such a fun time talking about the different questions and answers at the fireside! Before I knew it she was home and saying gooodbye and I was Ready. For. Dinner. <br />
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Russ had come home while I was talking, deboned the chicken, added the Costo curry sauce, and started eating with the girls. I got a plate and sat down with them at the table, saying with a tired sigh, "I may be out of words today. š And I am Ready. For. Bed."<br />
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<br />Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-80824130587421023322018-02-04T19:21:00.003-08:002018-02-04T19:21:58.621-08:00Mother thoughts<div dir="ltr">
We often sit behind a young family in church. I usually watch the motion of the children and am grateful for this place in time, when my kids (usually) sit still without needing my attention and I'm able to focus more fully on the meeting. </div>
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Today, though, I watched the 6 year old boy snuggle up against his mom and watched her lean her face against his head, and for a moment I was jealous.</div>
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You see, I still love my kids like that. I still think they're adorable and amazing. I would love to tuck them under my arm and rest my head against theirs... But I know exactly the resistance and discomfort that that would bring. Every now and then I get a moment, but for the most part I feel like mothering these adults and almost-adults is mothering at a little distance rather than the mothering with all of the snuggling.</div>
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I wouldn't trade. My grown and almost grown children are so amazing. I'm delighted by the people they're becoming. </div>
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But sometimes I do miss the snuggles. </div>
Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-81534248320811423782017-11-01T23:48:00.001-07:002017-11-01T23:50:35.445-07:00Lessons from FallSummer is my favorite time and every year I feel punched in the gut when I realize itās really going to end. But then once I reconcile myself to the change of season (especially if the skies stay blue) I am enchanted by the beauty that is Fall. Iām also endlessly interested in the lessons (spiritual and not quite spiritual) that I learn from the things around me.<br />
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<strong>#1)</strong> The first year we were in Oregon I noticed that the leaves changed colors for a long LONG time. First one kind of tree and then another, a succession of intensifying colors and leaves falling. For a while I was a little cranky about this---I thought that it would be a lot more beautiful if everything turned at one in a glorious finale of color. Like Maine, I thought. (Not that Iāve ever been to Maine at all, much less to see the leaves.) But then I realized that this gradual Fall had a serious benefit because it stretched out the beauty over a longer time. Instead of one major moment there were a series of smaller moments. <br />
Sometimes I might want my life to feel like a (picture of a) Maine autumn looks, like the finale of a fireworks show. But in reality itās probably better to pace myself, to stretch out the moments of joy and fun and happiness over more time rather than experiencing them all at once. <br />
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<strong>#2)</strong> In Hendersonville one time my dad took me for an autumn drive to show me some trees. I canāt remember exactly how we got there, but I remember what we saw once we arrivedāenormous flame colored trees around the perimeter of a factory. He told me that every year those trees were brilliantly colored. Iāve noticed that in the years sinceāthat the trees that are beautiful one year are also beautiful the next. <br />
It was an adventure the first fall or two in Oregon (or would have been, had I been emotionally stable enough to appreciate it) learning the spots of fall beauty in the area. The scarlet trees behind the gymnastics club, the multi-colored trees lining Evergreen, the late turning tree in the yard across the street, the red trees on the way to Glencoe, the burning bushes in the Costco Parking lot and at Intel. Each year I watch for the now-predictable places of beauty, watch for them and cheer inwardly when they hit their peak of beauty.<br />
I think maybe life is like this--that there are predictable places of beauty in our lives, like a Christmas LotR marathon, family game nights, and a beach trip with friends. Pieces of beauty small and large that dot our years, coming back every year to delight us.<br />
That is also good for me to remember. That the beach trip is over for this year, but it will come again. That there are always things to look forward to, predictably beautiful moments that will bring happiness and joy.<br />
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#3) I can still remember the year in Durham that I was determined to take a picture of the perfect autumn leaf. I looked and looked and looked. And much to my surprise, I never found one. Because when I looked up close, the most beautifully colored leaves were never perfect. I finally had an a-ha moment: the colors come as the leaves are dying. The colors are a moment of brilliance before the leaves fall from the trees and the trees go dormant. <br />
I thought for a long time that year about the profoundnesss of this understanding--that there can be flaws in things that are amazingly beautiful, that sometimes the process of death brings great beauty. And I remember it every year as I scuff along the sidewalk through brightly colored leaves.<br />
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So forgive me, Autumn, for dreading your approach. And thank you for your beauty and the lessons you teach.Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-20252031214036687612017-10-28T01:36:00.001-07:002017-10-28T01:36:02.348-07:00Times and Seasons<p dir="ltr">"Do you still blog?" Jason asked the other night while we were talking on the phone.  </p>
<p dir="ltr">"Maybe once a month if I'm lucky," I answered with regret.</p>
<p dir="ltr">---</p>
<p dir="ltr">Blogging isn't popular anymore like it used to be, but I never blogged because it was a trendy thing to do.  I blogged then for the same reason I wish I was blogging now--because I had pictures and words and wanted a place to record them.</p>
<p dir="ltr">---</p>
<p dir="ltr">For whatever reason(s) I just can't seem to find the time in my life for a lot of things right now.  So I keep reminding myself that this season is extremely finite.  In fact I try not to look at the endpoint because it looms so large.  When it finally does arrive, I'll have time for different things, hopefully even more blogging.  But for <u>now</u> I'm just going to enjoy this season.  </p>
<p dir="ltr">[Blogged from my bed on my phone when I was supposed to be sleeping. ]</p>
Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-82105083794648027932017-09-04T00:05:00.001-07:002017-09-04T00:06:12.965-07:00A nighttime miracle?<p>Iāve had some amount of pain during the night for years thanks to my unstable SI joint.  Thanks to medication itās been well managed for over 3 years and wasnāt really something I thought a lot about.  Last year around Thanksgiving, though, a thyroid medicine change caused an enormous spike in my nighttime pain.  Instead of just being in my butt it was tension in my hamstrings, calves, and feet.  And instead of being managed by my medication, it was like being on fire all night long.</p> <p>In the intervening months itās been up and down, with an awful lot of down.  Unexpected things have set it off and sometimes the things that I have tried to manage the pain have ended up making it worse.  </p> <p>It wasnāt very bad at the beach or on the cruise, which I now think is due to the excellent physical therapy treatment called āputting your legs in the warm minerally ocean for hours every day.ā  Sadly this successful treatment isnāt covered by insurance.  <img class="wlEmoticon wlEmoticon-sadsmile" style="style" alt="Sad smile" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhso5I2G6NOhrkshFmUc3Uq_yGeuKQD0IXdLu5ai92nt1V9BDSkuzDPGgidRfhTbNmod5xqInnJRBcHE97-RQhb_BxUXzKH8F8DVkMdkk2x7_uiOMJf10KHIFickhkwBCDr5fTvjzprlw/?imgmax=800" /></p> <p>In the weeks since weāve been home from the cruise itās gotten worse and worse and made my nights more and more miserable.  Two weeks ago I even bought a portable inflatable hot tub on Amazon, thinking that surely soaking in the hot water every night before bed would provide some relief.  To my surprise/disappointment/frustration it wasnāt helpful at all, although sitting out there every night with Russ was definitely a relationship benefit.</p> <p>-----</p> <p>Last Sunday I noticed an announcement in the bulletin about a blood drive on Thursday.  I tend to ignore those announcements these days because the last time I gave blood a couple of years ago I bled so slowly that I timed out and they threw away my blood.  It hurt WAY too much for that to be ok with me, and I figured Iād have to find other ways to be a good citizen.  But this time the announcement said that there is a blood shortage in our area and I thought maybe, if I could find a way to increase my chances of donating successfully, I would donate again.  After church I did some googling (what did we do before google??) and found two suggestions: hydrate well (which Iād already known and already done) and take aspirin to thin the blood.  I tracked down some aspirin that day and took it that night and the next day, and worked on hydrating even more, even though I was really always drinking water already.</p> <p>On Tuesday I had a massage with a new massage therapist at work.  I explained to him what my biggest problems are right nowāthe car accident shoulder, and the night time fiery tension.  After the massage he said something I wasnāt expecting to hear.  He said that my leg muscles felt very dehydrated, and that when muscles and fascia are dehydrated they can drag against each other and cause pain.  </p> <p>This was interesting AND frustrating, since I was already trying so hard to be hydrated!  It made me think about the fact that while I was always drinking water, I rarely actually <em>felt</em> hydrated.  But I didnāt know what to do about it.  It was also frustrating that despite having had an excellent massage, Tuesday night was hugely painful.</p> <p>Wednesday night was YW, and it was a combined personal progress night.  I didnāt want to go because I never want to go (though Iām always happy once Iām there) and I considered not going because I figured there would be plenty of leaders there and no one would miss me.  But I grabbed my water bottle and went, though a little late as always.</p> <p>I was sitting between my friend who cuts my hair, and one of the other leaders.  As I grabbed my water bottle to take a drink, I told Kathy that I was signed up to donate blood the next day but I wasnāt very confident that Iād been able to, because I was having such a difficult time getting hydrated.  And then she said, </p> <blockquote> <p align="left"><em>Sometimes I put a teaspoon of chia seeds in my water bottle because drinking the water with the chia in it makes the water stay in my body longer and hydrates me better.</em></p> </blockquote> <p align="left">My first thought was āthatās so strange" and my second was āgood thing I have some chia seed Iāve never been able to figure out how to use, Iām totally going to try that.ā  So Thursday morning I got up, grabbed a full water bottle, and added 3/4 t. of chia seed, shook it, and started drinking.  </p> <p align="left">Wow was that strange.  Kind of like drinking water with frog eyes in it.  But it wasnāt unbearable and so I kept drinking it.  The first thing I noticed was that I needed to go to the bathroom much less throughout the day.  The second thing I noticed was that when I went to give blood (after having had at least 6 chia seed spiked water bottles throughout the day) the needle went in much more easily and they got enough blood in time!!</p> <p align="left">[Fun facts: You have 20 minutes to donate blood.  It took me 9.5 minutes this time.  The guy said he thought the average was 6-7 minutes.  Russ is an excellent blood donater and currently holds the record for the Red Cross bus at Intel for a 4.5 minute donating.]</p> <p align="left">The third thing I noticed was that my muscles stayed relaxed.  All. Night. Long.  It was <em>AMAZING</em> and I was so grateful that I wanted to cry.  I was afraid to celebrate too soon, though, because Iāve had other randomly better nights.  So Friday I focused on more hydration again and again on Friday night I was fine!  Last night was my third good night, and that was after working outside for 7 hours in the heat on Cindy Lynnās deck!</p> <p align="left">Iām hopeful for the first time in a long time.  I have prayed and prayed and prayed about this.  I have taken so many supplements hoping that they would help that buying a hot tub didnāt seem like an unreasonable expense.  I even investigated and bought (and am using) hemp oil, which is supposed to help with pain and sleeping.  Finally I feel like I have a real answer to my prayers, a miracle that occurred in the most random way possible.  Iām so glad I decided to try to give blood this week!</p> <p align="left">-----</p> <p align="left">On Friday I googled more.  Some people, it seems, have problems hydrating well with plain water, which almost all I ever drink.  For the time being Iām going to try to drink only my frog-eye water, water with electrolytes in it, or at the very least, water with a pinch of sugar and a pinch of sea salt.  Iām very curious to see if I notice any other changes as I become better hydrated.</p>Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-24085968651249847682017-05-18T15:29:00.000-07:002017-05-18T15:29:40.387-07:00The tank top miraclesI always wish I could really see all of the places where the Lord touches my life, see and feel and understand which bits were evidences of divine love. Would I be surprised? Have I recognized many already? Are there so many more I'm not seeing? <br />
<br />
I wonder.<br />
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Sometimes something will happen and I'll think that it was a convenient coincidence...but then sometimes something else will happen that, for me anyway, solidifies the situation as a Tender Mercy. Like the tank top miracles a couple of weeks ago.<br />
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My car accident shoulder has been bothering me this year. Not in an every-minute-of-the-day kind of way, but at night and with some kinds of movement. One day I was at work and mentioned to the naturopath that I probably needed some acupuncture on my shoulder. A couple of hours later she came out of her office and said that she'd had a cancellation and could do it that afternoon after I was done working. As I was sitting on her table and she was getting ready to start I had a little sinking feeling...she was going to need me to take my sweater off to access the front of my shoulder and that was going to make me uncomfortable. But then just as quickly as I had that thought, I had another one. In an unusual turn of events <i>I was wearing a tank top</i> under my sweater! <br />
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That morning I'd picked a v-neck sweater to wear and had wondered if it would be a little too low, so I'd also grabbed a tank top to wear under it even though in the back of my mind I knew that I regularly wore it alone. Who knew how grateful I'd be for that tank top just a couple of hours later!<br />
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I think I told Jared about what had happened later when he asked me how my day was. I told him I thought it was probably a tender mercy, and how grateful I'd been to have the tank top on under my sweater.<br />
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About two weeks later I was at work again and my shoulder was bothering me again. I had to reach under the desk to pull out a plug and re-plug it and the action of reaching was seriously painful. When I mentioned it to Hilary she told me that she had an opening on her schedule again that day. (I should mention that both of these last minute openings were highly unusual, she's often booked out a week in advance.) So once again I found myself sitting on her table, having that sinking feeling about needing to take my sweater off, and once again in EXACTLY the same way I realized...I was wearing a tank top!<br />
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It had happened in just the same way. I had taken down another v-necked sweater that I regularly wore alone, been concerned that it would be too low, and put on a tank top first. I hadn't even thought about it after that because (as it always does) within a few minutes sweater pulled up in front and the tank top wasn't even visible. <br />
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Sitting on the table in Hilary's office I happily pulled off my sweater. But part of my brain was on fire. "Did you SEE that?!?" it asking. "Not once, but TWICE!" Those random thoughts in my head (that really do sound like every other thought I've ever had) nudged me towards the tank tops, on days when having a tank top on was going to bring peace to my heart. <br />
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Tender mercies indeed.Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-79507264280453873712017-05-18T14:09:00.000-07:002017-05-18T14:09:39.464-07:00Election Fallout...I just saw a post on facebook talking about someone having a hard 2016 and feeling like they were still recovering from the last year. I'm still not over 2016. One of the parts of my life that seemed relatively stable last year that I didn't think needed that much worry (beyond the normal amount, anyway) was Cindy Lynn's health status. I never expected the election would go the way it did, putting her access to healthcare in jeopardy. That in and of itself is traumatic, but what's been worse has been the almost absolute silence from all of our family members. I feel like I don't even know how to process it. I'll work and work on it and get to a place of calm (not necessarily peace, but at least neutrality) and then it will come up again in Washington and start all over again in my heart. I normally chat with my sisters in a group chat at least several times a week--after the election I didn't feel able for almost 2 months. I have felt so betrayed on so many levels. And while I'm succeeding at surrendering to some of the difficult situations in my life, surrendering to the idea of my precious child not having access to the life saving medical treatments she needs...I just don't know how to do that. Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-87226917685237694622017-03-15T23:16:00.001-07:002017-03-16T11:00:29.948-07:00Calling Thoughts<div dir="ltr">
I'm not sure if you know this about me, but I don't do change well at all. Not in any area of my life, really.<br />
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One place I'm almost always resistant āto change is in my calling at church. Even when I feel like I've had plenty of warning from the spirit that a change is coming (which, interestingly, has happened when I've had callings that I've loved--isn't it nice of Heavenly Father to have given me a heads up?) I've still struggled with the change. And even when I've had a calling I haven't loved (bored behind the piano much???) I haven't handled change well.<br />
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Some of my less graceful responses to callings have included "no one cares about that calling" and "you want me to do what??" But despite my issues with change in general and with being asked to do something I don't want to do, I have a multifaceted testimony of callings.</div>
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I remember when I was called to be the Laurel advisor many years ago. It was the first time I really saw that there was power in being set apart. I walked into the Bishop's office, was set apart, and walked out loving Brandi Butler. And not because Brandi was easy to love, but because the spirit changed my heart.<br />
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Last year when I was called to play the piano in primary I wasn't thrilled about it. It turned out to be a good experience in several ways, though. Yes, I was bored a good amount of the time. (I'm not really good at doing a mediocre job of something while watching someone else do a mediocre job of something I'm terrific at!) But I was surprised at how often the primary songs would be in my mind, bringing peace though a difficult time in my life. Best of all, being the pianist occasionally meant I got to sub as the chorister, including teaching one of my all-time favorite Christmas songs to the primary kids last year. <br />
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At the beginning of this year I was asked to be the assistant Mia Maid advisor. The calling was presented in the least attractive way possible and I responded with my usual lack of graciousness. I was especially unhappy about having to go to YM/YW on Wednesday nights since I work on Wednesdays. And it's true, I am tired and have to take a nap between work and YW and we often eat leftovers that night. But it's also amazingly true that I'm actually enjoying myself, and loving these sweet girls who I had mostly never noticed before. <br />
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We have a terrific home teacher. He's retired now but has been a super successful businessman, a stake president, and a mission president. I noticed recently that he must have a new calling, probably something like Webelos. Every week when I get to the church (a few minutes late, of course) I see him in a room with the boys. Maybe he loves doing it. But really there's every chance he doesn't, or that he didn't when he was called. I'm inspired by his service at what is a far more taxing calling than either playing the piano or being the assistant Mia Maid advisor. <br />
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So this is my goal, for next time. To do a better job of keeping the "I hate change and am sure I will hate this calling" freak out inside my head, and give the Lord a chance to show me how wrong I am yet again.</div>
Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-10851455158843907152017-01-29T21:15:00.001-08:002017-01-29T21:17:39.891-08:00Best and worst of 2016 <p dir="ltr">In the category of "better late than never."</p>
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When we moved to Oregon and the kids could go part time to school and the 6th grade had a band it was like a long time dream come true for me. I have loved their band experience. The two flutes of my fantasies and a fun saxaphone as well.</div>
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<span style="text-align: left;">They all enjoyed band in middle school. Especially in 7th grade when their band director was a lot of fun. I loved it when I could see them during a concert. </span></div>
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They all played their freshman year at Glencoe. What's not to like about teens in formal attire, right? </div>
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But that's where the one-band-path stopped. Jenna wanted to play her flute again this year. (Yay!) Jared (who had hated marching band with a passion) chose to be in 0 period Jazz band instead of regular band, so that the marching band issue wouldn't be raised. And Rachel wanted to take other classes, so she dropped band altogether. </div>
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It hurt my heart, but I knew she needed to make her own decisions. As great as released time seminary is (and it *is* great!) it takes the place of one elective. I could understand that Rachel wanted to have another elective class instead of having both of her electives taken by seminary and band.</div>
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Now Jared is talking about not taking jazz band next year. He's really enjoyed it, but it does mean that he has an early start 4 days a week. And once wrestling and lacrosse start, he's so busy every afternoon and evening. I can tell that the schedule is wearing on him.</div>
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It's not like they were ever going to be professional musicians, I need to remember that. It's provided them experiences and memories that they will always have. I just need to keep remembering that it's their lives, not mine, and be grateful for the years of band we've had. </div>
Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-50916830399466696022017-01-04T22:52:00.002-08:002017-01-04T22:52:49.401-08:00Reading the Book of Mormon<span style="font-family: inherit;">Four years ago I <a href="http://crayzdaze.blogspot.com/2013/01/how-to-read-book-of-mormon-more-slowly.html" target="_blank">wrote</a> about my super slow scripture study program. At the beginning of 2016 I felt like I should read the entire Book of Mormon during the year, so I abandoned my slow study somewhere in 2nd Nephi and embarked on a different experience for the year. O<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129;">n December 30th that I finished the "Read the Book of Mormon in 1 year" challenge. That is much faster than my typical scripture reading, but it was a good experience. It reminded me that over the last few years when I've felt like I've known few things, I've known that I love the Book of Mormon, that it helps me feel the spirit, and that my life is better when I read it.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129;">The interesting effect of having just pushed through and read the assigned amount every day (almost) for the year is that by the end I was desperate to be able to slow down and read more about different verses, figure out what they meant or how they were meaningful. 2016 made me excited to go back to reading slowly again. Back to 2nd Nephi I go!</span></span>Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-88399558744305003812016-12-26T00:22:00.001-08:002016-12-26T00:26:45.091-08:00Love (2.0) and Friendship<span style="font-size: x-small;"><i>[a moment of silence please to appreciate my clever Jane Austen reference in the title...]</i></span><br />
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Last week I finished a book called "Friendship for Grownups." It didn't say anything I didn't already know, but was a good reminder of the importance of friendships in a woman's life. When I finished the book I started thinking about friendship in my life right now. I feel like I'm in a strange place, caught in between the demands of my life, the needs of my family, and the amount of energy I have available. Friendship looks different to me right now than it did before we moved to Oregon.<br />
<br />
I decided that I would pray for guidance to know if there's more I should be doing now in the area of friendship.<br />
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I was at work on Wednesday and two patients were waiting by my reception desk. I had been chatting with one of them and she made a comment about not liking to backtrack when she was out running errands. That made me laugh, because I HATE backtracking! I've recently been fussing at myself for being so neurotic about it, and have tried to tell myself that if I have to drive in the direction that I just came from all will not be lost. When I told her that I hated backtracking too, the other woman started laughing and said that she was the same way! We talked for a few minutes about how crazy this thing makes us and how our husbands (mostly) don't understand, and we laughed and laughed.<br />
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Wednesday after work I was at the dentist getting my teeth cleaned. The hygienist was super chatty which was fun except that it's hard to have a two-way conversation when you're having your teeth cleaned! At some point she was telling me that she has a problem with sounds, and she started describing some kinds of sounds that bother her. (The bathroom fan, her always-drumming-on-something husband.) When she next had her fingers out of my mouth I said, "I'm just the same way! I hate repetitive sounds, and almost all sounds when I'm tired." Then I told her that I had learned about a syndrome called misophonia, sometimes thought of as a hatred of sound. We talked about the sounds that make us crazy and how frustrating this is our lives. <br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">When I got home and was thinking back over my day, still feeling some of the emotions of the day, I had a memory. In the first year or so that we lived here I read a book called Love 2.0. The author (a professor at UNC) <span style="background-color: white;">redefines love not just as a something that we're depending on our significant others to provide for us, but also as micro-moments of connection between peopleāeven strangers.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;">When that came to mind I had an ah-ha moment. I hadn't thought of the Love 2.0 micro-moments in a long time, but I realized as this came to my mind that I'd had two significant Love 2.0 moments that day, moments that had been fun, joyous, in the one case filled with laughter (it's too hard to laugh much when someone's hand and a sharp object are in your mouth) and in both cases really satisfying. </span></span><br />
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I think this was an answer to my prayer--not just having these two experiences in the same day, but also having such a clear recollection of them instead of them just being rolled into the detritus of the day, and then having the memory of the Love 2.0 book. I think this answer was showing or reminding me that there are different kinds of connection that can be emotionally satisfying in my life. It's definitely something I need to keep praying about, but I love seeing this answer.Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-35377719085723462822016-12-25T14:32:00.000-08:002017-01-21T15:12:05.077-08:00Christmas Letter 2016<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj36ZcAtV2QgtF-3nuqqCxfrgLsQ_5q-9nxZqN5z0C9NaJyyKTFtuGF1FT5BKhu_BHxrcEmFX7Uf4RMnVxsux57qPtRKVFrEyDU9lJmzSx2PHJp8BtAoMUzHSoyLWx4VD3Ab1tKQOMKHA/s1600/DSC_9355great+lighter.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj36ZcAtV2QgtF-3nuqqCxfrgLsQ_5q-9nxZqN5z0C9NaJyyKTFtuGF1FT5BKhu_BHxrcEmFX7Uf4RMnVxsux57qPtRKVFrEyDU9lJmzSx2PHJp8BtAoMUzHSoyLWx4VD3Ab1tKQOMKHA/s640/DSC_9355great+lighter.JPG" width="640" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8aKrgljwvi60M4Hhx17n-8k8Vb9smNrTLse0OnIW3Ygo-F6vuDMELUUXtPS07ggmFHt98TXN9sgEz3f0HlFNPxIYZCvbKDUARi2xGBv00pV3CBGnmMbXjhcmQ5AuXCdTXTNuJxMlLow/s1600/Screen+Shot+2017-01-21+at+3.10.17+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="436" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8aKrgljwvi60M4Hhx17n-8k8Vb9smNrTLse0OnIW3Ygo-F6vuDMELUUXtPS07ggmFHt98TXN9sgEz3f0HlFNPxIYZCvbKDUARi2xGBv00pV3CBGnmMbXjhcmQ5AuXCdTXTNuJxMlLow/s640/Screen+Shot+2017-01-21+at+3.10.17+PM.png" width="640" /></a><br />
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<br />Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-88053611470479625482016-12-22T01:00:00.003-08:002016-12-22T01:00:47.732-08:00Magic connectionsThere's some magic in a real connection, I think. You can't guarantee it will happen, you can't make it happen, you can just hope. A lot of the time Russ & I live our lives in our normal pattern. Normal hugs before and after work, normal kisses in the kitchen, normal conversation about what just happened or what's coming up. But sometimes, usually later at night, magic happens and there's a different connection, a connection beyond the mundane. Then we talk and talk and talk. Work issues and resolutions, interactions, stories, frustrations, laughter about excel files that are just moments from becoming sentient. Laughing and listening and knowing that we're going to really pay for this late night tomorrow, but always so glad it happened. <br />
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You can't make it happen, I've tried before. That's how I know that when it does happen it's magic.Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-27243415674519442062016-11-06T15:05:00.003-08:002016-11-06T20:43:02.706-08:00math lessons (learned the hard way)<div dir="ltr">
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sometimes<br />
in math<br />
x=y.</div>
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<br />
but sometimes<br />
xā y<br />
where x=what i need<br />
and y=what you can give.</div>
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i have learned<br />
it does no good<br />
trying to change<br />
what is.</div>
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<br /></div>
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if you cannot</div>
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change y</div>
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and<br />
i cannot<br />
change x<br />
it might be better<br />
to set that<br />
problem<br />
aside<br />
for now.</div>
Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-50175542803766703132016-11-03T14:13:00.001-07:002016-11-03T22:52:06.867-07:00Cindy and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day<div dir="ltr">
I got up too late to eat breakfast before I left.<br />
I forgot to take my water bottle into the gym.<br />
I got a headache from exercising.<br />
I bought Greek yogurt at Fred Meyer to get rid of the headache but then spilled some of it on my exercise pants.<br />
When I got back to the car after buying Rachel's marker at Michael's the car wouldn't start.<br />
Russ didn't answer his phone...<br />
When I went to Les Schwab to get a new battery there was a long line and the tire smell in the store was so strong it made my head hurt more.<br />
Russ didn't answer his phone...<br />
I stayed up too late and am tired today.<br />
The house is a mess and I'm too tired to clean so I'm going to take a nap instead.</div>
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Some days are like that, even in Australia. ļ</div>
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[So glad my period waited to start until I was home!!!]</div>
Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8988373850574930266.post-11699881837324286512016-11-01T13:46:00.002-07:002016-11-01T13:46:18.826-07:00Scripture power<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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For years and years I resisted having family scriptures in the morning. Resisted with all of my might and strength and sleep. And then the year before last I gave in. We were consistently NEVER remembering at dinner and I wanted family scriptures more than I wanted that additional sleep. But it always killed me to get up.</div>
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As we've had morning scriptures for the last two years I've been really surprised at how much I've liked the feeling of doing it, regardless of how tired I've been. I've liked the *feeling* of being together in the morning, studying God's word for us before we start our days.</div>
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But this school year is killing me worse than normal. I'm not sure if it's working two days a week now or what, but I just can't find my balance. I'm out of both physical and emotional energy long before bedtime many days, always on the verge of depression, always worried about getting sick.</div>
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It finally occurred to me that now that everyone has smart phones with all of the stellar reminder features, we could go back to trying at night.</div>
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And do you know what? A part of me resisted. Because of that great morning feeling. But something has to change in order for me to survive this school year. So...</div>
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For the last couple of nights we've had family scriptures about 9:30. And do you know what? I've *loved* it! The cozy feeling of our family gathered together at the end of our day reading and/or listening to God's word for us. What a beautiful thing.</div>
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Cindyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13869834635154658664noreply@blogger.com0