Letting Go

This post is about my feelings about dressing my little girls alike. I realize that there are people who dislike the practice of dressing multiples alike. That is fine with me. But please don't tell me about it!

I was thrilled that my first child was a girl, and I always wanted another one.

Imagine my happiness when I found out I was going to have two more little girls! (Which was completely separate from the shock of finding out that I was going to have three babies instead of one.) One of the reasons that I wanted another girl was that I just love little girly clothes so much. So really, having a set of little girls was a dream come true.

I didn't always dress the girls alike because we couldn't afford to--a lot of their clothes came from an annual consignment sale. But when I could afford to, I did. And when I found something that Jared could wear too?? Well that was real bliss.

For a while I felt a little guilty about the fact that I really enjoyed dressing my girls alike. One day when they were about a year old I mentioned this to a friend, and she made the comment that as difficult as raising triplets was, I should probably enjoy whatever things I could. That made sense to me, and I put away the guilt.

She was right. Having triplets was really hard for me. It was nice that there was one part of it I always enjoyed--having matching girls. And match they did. Including the time when Rachel cut a huge chunk out of Jenna's hair. Jenna reciprocated by cutting a much smaller chunk out of Rachel's hair. I marched them to the closest hair salon where they got matching (very short) haircuts.

And then the moment I was not ready for came. It was time for hair cuts early this summer and Rachel announced, "I want to grow my bangs out." Now I am not a fan of growing bangs out, because it is such a messy hair-in-the-face process. But I knew that my resistance was also because then my little girlies would not be the same. Fortunately for Rachel we had a visitor who reminded me that they needed to be able to be individuals. When I cut their hair, I didn't trim Rachel's bangs. And it is a mess, just like I knew it would be. But it is also adorable.

Rachel and Jenna haven't dressed alike during the week for several years now. They choose their own clothes during the week, and they definitely have their own style. Rachel loves dresses (except when climbing trees) and Jenna prefers jeans and stripes. Occasionally they dress alike--sometimes accidentally, sometimes on purpose. It always makes me smile. On Sundays I still lay out everyone's clothes, and so they are almost always dressed alike. But a couple of weeks ago one of them said that they wished they didn't have to always dress alike. I sighed. Yes, I knew this was coming. I wasn't ready for it. And so I suggested a compromise. Some days I will choose their (matching) Sunday clothes. Days like yesterday, when they wore their new fall jumpers. Days like the Sunday before Christmas, when they'll wear their new dresses that I'm copying from a Pottery Barn ad. And some days they can choose whatever they want.

They both seemed pleased with that plan. But I know it's only a matter of time before they reject the matching clothes altogether. I'm sure I won't be ready...