It is what it is

Invariably when I’d be talking with my aunt and we came upon a difficult topic, she’d say (in her still-a-southern-girl-after-all-these-years accent) “It is what it is, honey!”

And I, in my wisdom, would think things like “No!”  And “Do not go gently into that good night!”  And stuff like that.

Because I was sure she was wrong in giving in and letting it be.  Whatever it was, I thought she should fight to change it and make it different.

But as I’ve gotten older my feelings have changed.  I’ve seen the endless frustration I can (and have) cause myself by trying to change situations in my life that I actually have no control over.  I’ve seen the energy that can be wasted, the anger that is the result—none of it is good.

So now I’m working to be more like my aunt.  Working to realize that there actually are a lot of things in my life that I can’t change.  That fighting things only brings more exhaustion and frustration into my life.  Working to understand deep in my heart that in the end I’ll be so much better off if I can say with her, “It is what it is, honey.”

(now if only I could say it in a terrific southern accent!)