Trusting, perspective, and an answered prayer

Yesterday was our ward’s Christmas Dinner & Live Nativity.  While my shepherds and my wise man were standing out in the chilly night I was visiting with women in the ward that I rarely get a chance to chat with.  They were asking about the situation with Russ’s job, and I was telling about some of the things that have happened.  As I told about my odd compulsion to paint the kitchen cabinets and being able to get in to see the physical therapist while we still have health insurance, one of them made a comment that solidified something in my mind and heart.

“Well,” she said, “if He is involved in these details, surely he is watching over you and has a plan for your family.”

Yes.

I am still sad.  Sad to be preparing my house to try to sell it.  Sad to think of leaving North Carolina.  But I really do trust that if God has intervened to make sure that I start painting my cabinets while the weather is nice and that I can get physical therapy, then He surely will make sure the right job happens in the right place and at the right time.

 

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People are usually pretty fascinated when they find out that we have triplets.  (I don’t blame them, I’m still fascinated myself.)  Several people asked about them on Tuesday while we were fixing & serving lunch at the missionary zone training.  Invariably they comment that it must have been hard to have three babies at the same time.  Invariably I agree.

I always go to the same place in these conversations.  I say, “It was [almost] the hardest thing that ever happened to me.”  And then I continue, “And then all of a sudden it changed, and it became the best thing that ever happened to me.”  (Which is so very completely totally true.)

This time, as I said this I felt the Spirit prick my heart.

“What did I just say?  That the HARDEST thing in my life became the BEST thing in my life.”

Later I explored this thought a little more.  I mentally poked around at other events in my life that I have labeled HARD things.  It was a hard thing years ago when our dearest friends graduated and moved away from Durham.  But as I thought about it, I realized that not only was it vital that our friends end up living near their families, but their absence created the opportunity/necessity for other relationships to become more important.  Our other friends have become like our family; I cherish them and consider their friendship one of the best things in my life.

As I thought about this throughout the day, I felt the Spirit asking me, “Which BEST thing would you choose not to have?” And “How do you know what BEST things may still lie in store for you, as a result of the HARDEST thing you are going through now???” 

I KNOW for a fact that, had I the power to change life, I would never allow any of the hardest things.  Every time I look at my three beautiful children I give thanks  that I did not have that power, and that they are all here. 

 

I got the message.

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Josh assumed when he found out that his dad had been laid off that he wouldn’t be able to go to EFY next summer.  I told him that EFY is really important to us, and that I thought that if he could pay half, we would be able to afford half.  Then he had a fender bender in the parking lot at school (a place of driving insanity) and we got the bill this week.  Let’s just say it will cost almost 3 EFY’s.

I was really distressed.  Josh has been working for our neighbors and would have been able to pay for half of EFY, but this accident is going to take everything he can earn and we will still have to help pay for it.  Which means there is really no money for EFY.  Additionally, all of this has to be figured out pretty soon because EFY signup is just a couple of weeks after Christmas.

 

I came home from church tired.  I stayed up way too late last night, church is early, choir on fast sunday is always harder, and we had tithing settlement too.  I climbed into bed for a nap still thinking about EFY.  As I lay there waiting to fall asleep I prayed.  I told Heavenly Father how important we think EFY is for Josh in particular.  I told Him that I didn’t see that we had a way to pay for it.  I asked Him for help.  And then I went to sleep.

 

Tonight the doorbell rang while we were at the kitchen table playing a game.  At the door was a neighborhood friend with a Christmas card.  She said that she was worried about us and brought this because she wanted to make sure we were going to be ok.  I interpreted that to mean that there was some money in the card and I was surprised and touched.  I gave her a hug, she left and I went back into the kitchen.

I opened the envelope and pulled out the card and then a check.

Written for 75% of the cost of EFY.

 

My friend doesn’t know what EFY is.  She is not a religious person.  But I have not a single doubt that this evening she was a direct (and seriously speedy) answer to my prayer. 

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I keep remembering Elder Bednar’s talk on tender mercies, and his statement:

I testify that the tender mercies of the Lord are real
and that they do not occur randomly or merely by coincidence.

Often, the Lord’s timing of His tender mercies helps us to both discern and acknowledge them.

I am amazed and humbled as I keep track of the tender mercies that have occurred and are occurring in our lives right now.  And I am certain that the Lord is reminding me at every turn that He is more than mindful of us, and that we can trust Him.  With all of it—job, location,our whole lives.  Because His plan is the one that we really want.