Summer's End

This morning there was movement in the house early, feet running up and down the stairs, people talking in the kitchen, voices calling back and forth. Today is the start of band camp; for all intents and purposes the end of our summer. No more late night hanging out, no more sleeping in, no more lazy mornings. 

As always I am heartbroken to see it end, but this year perhaps more than most. This year when Jason heads back to BYU and Josh goes back to BYUI, the triplets will head off to high school and I will be here all alone for the first time in 27 years. I had enough time alone this spring to begin to get excited about the projects I can finally accomplish. And I will be able to spend time with Cindy Lynn and Kate. But there is no question that I will miss these languid summer days with their long books and movies and dinners on the deck in the cooling summer air.

This evening Russ and I sat on the deck until dark, talking and sketching plans for a deck addition.  The evening was quiet and I was startled to realize how much I was enjoying being out there with only him.  Then it was 9 and we heard the tired chatter of the kids being dropped off and suddenly the house was full and busy again and I was happy that we were all here together.

Last night we played a game, all crowded around the table.  They were noisy and obnoxious and in each other's faces and it was wonderful.  I feel such a need to make the moments count, as many of them as possible.  We're on a countdown to early mornings and full days and homework, so we have to enjoy this time as much as we can.

Will I ever figure out a way to let the summer go easily, to look forward without sorrow?  Or even with anticipation?  Maybe, but definitely not today.  Today I would grab with both hands and hold on with my feet digging into the sand to get another day of summer...