Compensated

“The Lord compensates the faithful for every loss. That which is taken away from those who love the Lord will be added unto them in His own way. While it may not come at the time we desire, the faithful will know that every tear today will eventually be returned a hundredfold with tears of rejoicing and gratitude.”   Joseph B. Worthlin

Recently I spent a lovely and emotionally satisfying weekend with two dear friends.  On Monday I woke up one last time in California.  As I lay there in the bottom bunk enjoying the opportunity to wake up slowly instead of all at once, a thought came into my mind.  And the thought was, 

You have been compensated.

Along with that thought came images.  First images of a dear friendship that has changed in recent years, bringing me much sorrow.  This friendship was the first adult friendship of the mind that I had, the first friend with whom I discussed the gospel deeply and it changed me for the better.  I've felt so much grief about this loss.

These images were followed, in quick succession, by the images of my two friends with whom I'd spent such a beautiful weekend.  Then images of other dear friends, friends who have a lot of ven diagram overlap, came to my mind.  My heart warmed as I thought of the blessings of having such friends.  And then the first thought echoed in my mind...

compensated

After years of praying with varying degrees of success that my heart would be changed and I would feel peace about the changed friendship, I felt new understanding.  That the Lord had understood my grief at this changed relationship.  And that he had been working in my life in a way that I only now understood, compensating me for what was lost.  I can't say that the sorrow and grief has gone completely, but it is so much better than it ever has been, and I have so much gratitude.